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The NCOA Adviser Reviews Team researches these products & services and may earn a commission from qualified purchases made through links included. NCOA does not receive a commission for purchases. If you find these resources useful, consider donating to NCOA.
Many of us want to share our lives with someone special, and online dating sites can make it easy to meet people who feel the same way. A good online dating platform should have a large number of users who meet your basic requirements (like sexual orientation, age, and location), have safeguards to minimize fake accounts and scams, and help you find people who share some of your interests and values.
Based on this criteria and our analysis of 20 online dating websites, we believe eHarmony is the best option for people over 50 looking for a serious relationship and it made our list of the best dating sites for seniors. In our eHarmony review, we’ll explain what sets this dating site apart from the rest, walk you through the setup process, break down the cost structure, and help you decide if it’s the right choice for you.
Romance or sweetheart scams
It’s important to be aware of romance scams when using online dating platforms. Romance scams, or “sweetheart scams,” are when someone creates a fake online persona to build a romantic relationship with a victim, trying to trick them into sending money or personal information.
The Federal Trade Commission (FTC), the U.S. government, and the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) warn online dating platform users about romance scams and their impact. In 2022, almost 70,000 people lost $1.3 billion collectively.
People using online dating platforms can report suspicious profiles and activity to the platform, the FTC, or the FBI.
Learn more about how to stay safe from sweetheart or romance scams when using online dating platforms.
Based on our firsthand testing experience, focus group interviews, and survey results, we believe eHarmony is the best dating site for adults serious about finding a long-term romantic partner. Compared to daters looking for a serious relationship, casual daters may be less likely to complete the 30-minute setup process or pay close to $480 in upfront subscription fees to message other users.
For those who put in the time, effort, and money, eHarmony offers a unique get-to-know-you experience. It starts with the lengthy compatibility quiz everyone completes when joining the site. An algorithm then compares your answers to others and assigns them a compatibility score between 60–140. The higher the score, the more you have in common. When viewing someone’s profile, you can see an analysis of the areas where you agree and disagree.
While a few other dating sites also use algorithms to match users with those who share their interests, we found the eHarmony quiz delves into far more topics, such as everyday habits, communication styles, childhood influences, personality traits, and decision-making tendencies.
“Some of the major signs of compatibility include mutual respect, proper communication, and a general vision for the future. On the other hand, predictors of incompatibility often result from some differences in values or goals, like having a dispute about family, finances, or particularly a style of life,” said Sham Singh, a psychiatrist with WINIT Clinic, who agreed that the eHarmony quiz is quite comprehensive. “Going beyond simple personality and investigating tastes and values, it gives a view of the well-roundedness of a potential suitor.”
But Singh and other relationship experts we interviewed warned us that quizzes can only do so much. “No quiz is ever going to replicate the complexity of human relationships, but getting some of these core factors of compatibility might go a long way in forging meaningful connections,” said Singh.
Sofie Roos, a licensed sexologistⓘ A specialist who studies human sexual behavior. and relationship expert at Passionerad based in Stockholm, Sweden, said the eHarmony quiz still barely touches the surface of what it takes to have a healthy relationship with someone. “We can still find strong love in people who are not just like us, and this test is far from as wide as it needs to be to be able to match us with people from the results. This [eHarmony] test tries to help, and I think it does to a level, but there’s no recipe for love.”
We agree that the compatibility score shouldn’t be the only thing you evaluate when getting to know someone or choosing who to message, but we believe it can be a good start. Consider using the compatibility analysis to guide some of your future conversations as you learn more about each other. Fortunately, it’s free to sign up and see who you’ve matched with on eHarmony, so you don’t have to make a financial commitment if you don’t match with many people.
The compatibility quiz isn’t the only reason we like eHarmony. Our Reviews Team’s July 2024 survey suggests eHarmony users experience fewer distasteful interactions and scams than users of other dating sites, although some of our focus group participants say fake profiles are becoming more common. Still, we appreciate the steps eHarmony takes to protect users, such as reviewing all photos for sexual or obscene content.
Below, we’ll take a closer look at how eHarmony works, who tends to use the site, what you can expect in terms of safety and privacy, what you can do with a free account versus a paid account, and more.
“I noticed you can only like eHarmony profiles—you can’t dislike them. You don’t have to say yes or no to someone, which I think might be more humanizing than other dating sites where you just swipe right or left. You can like profiles and save favorites, and there’s a way to remove a profile from your view if you really want to.”
– From our tester
The eHarmony sign-up process starts with some basic information: your gender, the gender you’re interested in dating, and the country you live in. You’ll be prompted to create a username and password, and then you can begin working on the compatibility quiz.
Our testers needed about 20 minutes to complete the five-part quiz, but don’t worry if you need to take a break—it saves your progress. eHarmony won’t let you retake the quiz until your paid membership renews in six to 24 months, depending on how long of a plan you choose when you sign up, so make sure you read each question and answer carefully. Your results affect which profiles are shown to you.
All of the questions are multiple-choice. If you don’t agree strongly with any of the answer choices, there’s no option to skip a question. Choose the best answer of the options given.
Here’s a quick look at some of the questions you can expect to answer in the first part of the quiz:
As the quiz progresses, it begins to ask about your interests and opinions, such as:
At this point, you’re about 40% through the five-part quiz. The next section shows you pairs of images and asks you to choose which one is more appealing.
At this point, one of our older adult testers—a woman in her 70s who is actively looking for love—nearly gave up on eHarmony. “They didn’t think about a 70-year-old taking this quiz,” she said. “It takes too much time, and I don’t care if he likes circles or not.”
She also had some valid points about the questionnaire being biased toward younger users:
“The other questions were for younger people, too. They asked about my perfect wedding but didn’t have the option for me to pick that I’m not getting married again no matter what. They didn’t have a lot of options for what you like to do in your free time or hobbies, and it didn’t give answers for older women at all. I like to play games on my phone, mess around in my garden, go for walks, and gossip. Then it asked what kind of sports I do. It should ask your age first and then ask questions for your age.”
No one gets to see your exact answers on the questionnaire, so it’s okay to select your best guess or treat the scenarios as hypothetical. You fill out a profile after completing the quiz, and that’s the best place to talk about what you like to do and your goals for the relationship.
Next up, the fourth section asks about your habits and preferences, including:
The final section of eHarmony’s compatibility quiz asks deeper, more intimate questions. Some questions present a hypothetical situation and ask how you would respond. Here are a few examples:
Finally, you’ll reach the end of the compatibility quiz. You’ll be asked to share a few more personal details to fill out your profile:
You may need another 10 minutes to answer some open-ended questions for your profile. You must choose at least one of 26 prompts to answer, and you can answer additional prompts later if desired. Some of the prompts include:
Prompts must be answered in 500 characters or fewer.
Next, you can go into more detail about yourself in the space that says, “Tell us about yourself!” eHarmony encourages using this space to say what you’re looking for in a relationship or in an ideal partner, but you can talk about anything. This is your space to make a good first impression and let others know about the things that are important to you. You can edit it later if you think of something else to say.
Next, add a photo of yourself to complete your profile. This is an important step, as adults with fewer than 50% complete profiles can’t like profiles or send messages. Our tester found that uploading a photo was the final hurdle to surpassing the 50% mark. This rule may help prevent fraud and improve profile quality. Your photo won’t be visible to other adults until it’s approved by the eHarmony team, which also helps prevent sexually explicit photos from being published.
That completes the basic eHarmony setup process, but we recommend reviewing your profile right away and adding more details to help adults get to know you better. You can add interests, hobbies, sports, your favorite foods and drinks, traveling preferences, and personality traits. You can also add more photos or fill out additional prompts from earlier.
Although creating an eHarmony profile takes longer than other online dating sites, we think getting a comprehensive compatibility analysis is worth it. Now that your profile is complete, you can browse other profiles that the eHarmony algorithm thinks are compatible with yours.
Each person gets a compatibility score from 60–140, and eHarmony claims people are compatible with you if they score 100 or better. Those with scores lower than 100 may still be worth getting to know, but since you have fewer similarities, you may have to make more compromises throughout your relationship.
When you view a profile, you can view your compatibility analysis. You’ll see how you match in four core areas:
Under each category, you’ll see your score and your match’s score in areas like logical traits, empathy, conventionality, introversion and extraversion, desire for structure, and more. This can spark ideas on what to talk about and help you reflect on the compromises you might need to make if you were in a long-term relationship with this person.
Of course, a good or bad compatibility score is just a score—it doesn’t necessarily mean you will (or won’t) hit it off with someone, nor does it predict the health of a relationship. Every partnership requires compromise, so it’s impractical to try to find someone who will be just like you. “If a relationship is truly compatible, the kind of compromise that has to be made is more of an equitable and respectful nature, not burdensome,” said Singh. Look for a partner with a similar life vision, core values, and lifestyle, but don’t worry if they have different hobbies or tastes.
“I joined eHarmony and paid for it and had a good experience. Yes, the questionnaire is long. I remember it took forever. It touches on everything and that’s why I think I had more success meeting people who I ended up in relationships with. Because you have to take the time. You can’t skip that part in eHarmony. So, it does work. I’m a fan of it, even though the fake profiles and scammers seem to get worse every year.”
– From Focus group participant
According to a Pew Research study, online dating sites have been used recently by 23% of adults in their 50s, 14% of adults in their 60s, and 12% of adults 70 or older. The study, conducted in July 2022, found eHarmony was second only to Match as the most popular dating website for adults dating after 50.
In July 2024, we surveyed 500 adults over 50 who had used an online dating site and found that Facebook Dating, Plenty of Fish, and Tinder were more popular than eHarmony. But eHarmony was the most popular option among adults who had paid for a dating service. While there are adults looking for serious relationships on all platforms, eHarmony seems to be the platform of choice for adults willing to invest financially in their search for love.
The Pew Research study also evaluated the popularity of major dating platforms among LGBTQ+ communities. Only 9% of online daters identifying as LGBTQ+ used eHarmony, making it the least popular platform among this demographic. But since the Pew Research survey results were released, eHarmony has worked with GLAAD to make its site more inclusive. It doesn’t hurt to create a free profile and see how many matches you get on eHarmony, but LGBTQ+ adults may find more matches on another site like Match.
Resources to get support
If you or someone you know over the age of 65 is experiencing abuse, neglect, or financial exploitation, here are some resources to get help:
For some, dating and the risk of possible rejection or exploitation can exacerbate symptoms of anxiety, depression, or unresolved trauma. Mental health treatment is available. See these resources to get the support you need:
Connecting with others online safely
Connecting with someone online can be a convenient way to engage in meaningful social relationships. But adults online can also be vulnerable to scams, fraud, or harassment. Here are a few essential tips on how to stay safe when messaging online, based on advice from our NCOA experts and our Reviews Team’s testing experience:
Our survey results indicate that eHarmony is the best platform for those who want to avoid romance scams and harassment. Our survey also asked older adults whether they had ever experienced the following on their dating app of choice:
eHarmony users were most likely to answer “None of the above.” About 66%–75% of users on other platforms said they experienced at least one of the above, but fewer than half of eHarmony users had ever encountered a scam or been harassed.
We believe this higher-quality experience stems partly from the lengthy setup process and the fact that you have to pay quite a bit of money to message other users, but eHarmony also has some helpful rules in place to protect privacy and encourage safety. For example, all photos are reviewed before they can be seen by other users, your profile must be 50% complete in order to like other profiles, and you’re only shown adults who are at least somewhat compatible with you. We also appreciate that sensitive details, like your income and birthday, aren’t shown to others.
It’s free to create a profile on eHarmony, but you need to upgrade to a premium account to interact with other users and get the most out of the service. You can pay for six, 12, or 24 months of service. Because finding the right partner can take time, it’s difficult to say how long you’ll need to use the platform. Choosing the right subscription can feel like a gamble, and we wish there were a month-to-month option. There are also no extra features with the Premium Plus or Premium Extra subscriptions, the only difference between the paid plans is the length of the subscription.
We broke down the short- and long-term costs of the three eHarmony plans in the table below.
| Premium Light | Premium Plus | Premium Extra | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Contract term | 6 months | 12 months | 24 months |
| Price per month* | $74.90 | $54.90 | $44.90 |
| Price per 6 months | $479.20 | N/A | N/A |
| Price per 12 months | $898.80 | $658.80 | N/A |
| Price per 24 months | $1,797.60 | $1,317.60 | $1,077.60 |
*eHarmony advertises a monthly price, which is misleading because you must pay the full term upfront. For example, if you want the Premium Light service, which lasts six months, you need to pay $479.20 upfront or split the cost into payments spread across two, three, or four months. The subscription renews automatically at the same rate when the subscription ends unless you change or cancel it.
The table below shows what you can do with a premium eHarmony subscription versus a free account.
| Feature | Free account | Premium account |
|---|---|---|
| Messages | None | Unlimited |
| See who’s viewed your profile | No | Yes |
| Photos | Blurry | Normal |
| Distance search | State or country | Custom radius |
| Search filters | Height, age, children, desire to have children | All filters |
| Expert tips on improving your profile | No | Yes |
If eHarmony’s price is a deal-breaker, we can recommend several other dating sites, including Match and SilverSingles, that are more affordable, have shorter contracts, or allow free messaging. The downside is that lower-cost services are easier for scammers to access, so you may encounter more fake profiles on other dating sites than on eHarmony.
To cancel your eHarmony subscription, log into your account. Click Data & Settings > Manage Profile > Amend Subscription. Click the cancellation button and follow the on-screen instructions to confirm your desire to cancel.
If you purchased the eHarmony app, you may need to follow different instructions. Learn more about canceling a subscription purchased on an Apple device or an Android device.
Email subscriptions@eharmony.com if you need help canceling your subscription.
eHarmony doesn’t offer refunds or a trial period. But Arizona, California, Colorado, Connecticut, Illinois, Iowa, Minnesota, New York, North Carolina, Ohio, Rhode Island, and Wisconsin state laws protect residents’ rights to cancel within three business days for a refund.
Who may love eHarmony
Who may want to avoid eHarmony
Contact eHarmony customer service by submitting a contact form on the website or emailing support@eharmony.com.
You can pay for an eHarmony subscription using Visa, Mastercard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.
Our Reviews Team researched more than 20 online dating sites and personally tested five and their accompanying apps. Although our testers didn’t go on dates, we evaluated the online experiences that led up to a date or connection. Based on independent research and consultation with experts, we determined these factors to be the most important when evaluating online dating sites:
To better understand the online dating landscape for older adults, we hosted focus groups, conducted surveys, and spoke to experts.
Our June 2024 Online Dating for Seniors Survey asked 500 older adults which online dating sites they prefer, what motivated them to use an online dating app in the first place, and more.
We learned that 40% of older adults used online dating sites to find a long-term romantic partner. The top motivators for pursuing online dating instead of in-person dating were:
While 67% of respondents have met in person with someone they connected with through an online dating site, 38% of respondents reported encountering fake profiles or someone trying to scam them. This prompted us to pay close attention to each site’s safety guidelines and privacy policies.
In July 2024, we sat down with nine older adults (ages 51–77) to talk about their experiences with online dating sites. We gathered helpful insights to inform our testing, including:
From our July 2024 Online Dating for Seniors Focus Group participants:
“I don’t hang out at clubs anymore. I don’t go to bars. So, it’s hard to meet people, you know, just walking around the street and everything. You don’t know if someone’s married or not, or engaged. So it’s just difficult to meet people my age.” — Female focus group participant, age 61
“I’ve had nothing but positive benefits from online dating as far as meeting people that I would’ve never met otherwise. And whether it was a new friendship or a new relationship, it’s definitely been a good experience.” — Female focus group participant, age 53
We spoke with eight experts on online dating, including a licensed sexologistⓘ A specialist who studies human sexual behavior. , a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT), and a neuropsychologist. We asked about the value of connectedness for older adults, the benefits and drawbacks of online dating, and how adults can choose an online dating site that’s right for them. We used expert insights to inform our recommendations for the top online dating sites for older adults.
“Online dating can increase self-esteem, build social circles, and lead to intimate relationships. The quality of one’s relationships directly impacts one’s mental and physical health outcomes, so even if dating only leads to more quality friendships, it’s worthwhile. And, of course, dating could lead to an incredible romantic relationship, perhaps the best of your life!” — Jessica Anne Engle, LMFT, a dating coach and founder of The Relationship Center
| Subscription price (website) | $44.90–$74.90/month | $3.32–$42.99/month | $15.99–$29.95/month | $13.95–$44.95/month |
| Subscription price (mobile app) | Same as desktop | Same as desktop | $18.33–$33.99/month | $15.95–$59.95/month |
| Target age | 18 and older | 18 and older | 50 and older | 50 and older |
| Free messaging | No | One person per day | No | No |
| Match system | Compatibility quiz | Profile-based algorithm | Profile-based algorithm | Personality test |
| Scam and harassment rate* | 46.5% | 66.7% | 62.5% | 66.7% |
| Best for | Best for serious relationships | Best value for what you get | Best for friendships and casual dating | Best for values-based matches |
*Percentage of users who experienced at least one fake profile, scam, or harassment incident, according to our July 2024 survey of 500 online dating site users over 50
If you don’t mind paying for an online dating service, eHarmony is a good choice for meeting adults serious about finding a compatible long-term partner. eHarmony offers a comprehensive compatibility quiz and insightful analysis that goes above and beyond any other dating platform’s matching algorithm.
We also think eHarmony is the best option for anyone hesitant to try online dating due to the potential risk of scams. Although scammers still exist on eHarmony, fraud seems to be less rampant there than on other dating platforms.
eHarmony is worth it if you’ve already used other dating platforms and have been disappointed by incompatible matches or a large number of fake profiles. eHarmony’s compatibility quiz, strict rules about photos, and lack of free messaging provide a high-quality experience. That said, it does cost $479.20 to use the site for six months (the required minimum contract for a paid account). If you’re on a budget, you may want to consider other options.
Based on 2020 survey results published on Statista, a study conducted by Pew Research in 2022, and our 2024 survey, eHarmony is mainly used by adults 30 or older. It’s the second-most popular dating site among adults 65 and older, and 34% of the eHarmony users in the Pew Research study were 65 and older.
eHarmony is best for heterosexual adults at least 50 years old looking for a long-term relationship. Our research shows that the platform is popular among older adults but hasn’t caught on among LGBTQ+ adults. Due to the cost of messaging on the platform, we believe it’s unlikely to be used by people who aren’t serious about finding love.
Have questions about this review? Email us at reviewsteam@ncoa.org.
